Friday, July 23, 2010

Coming up for air has already been almost 2 weeks since little Eliana arrived, and I feel like I am just starting to pull it together. Literally I don't think I've really gotten dressed in the past 3 weeks. I have barely showered, brushed my hair, or seen the sun. I mean my life has been Eliana. I know everyone warned me about this, but I really had no idea. Its really hard to get my own time. I don't actually mind it that much, but I know I probably don't look or smell the best. I can't wait to have more of a schedual.

And now I see why so many women don't breast feed. It is soo good for the baby, but no one else can help. I mean I am literally attached to Ellie because she needs to eat every 2-3 hours. So next week I am going to bust out the ol' breast pump...we'll see how that goes. I'm actually pretty nervous about it. I mean I already feel like a cow, but now I will actually have a machine milking me. Formula is already looking pretty tempting...

Eliana is constantly growing and she makes the cutest faces and sounds. Erik and I just stare at her a lot, which I'm sure makes her wonder if we have anything better that we could do. We love her, and are enjoying watching her grow.

Slowly I am trying to come up for air

Friday, July 16, 2010

"It's a new dawn. it's a new day. its a new life."

Last week our family came to visit, and to be here for the birth of our baby. Immediately I felt a little pressure. All these people were here to see a baby be born. What if she was late? At any rate, I tried to relax and enjoy family time.

Most of the week was spent relaxing and having my husband's family get to know where I come from better, as well our two families getting to know each other. We played video games, had a bbq, went to Navy Pier, and just had a good time. However as time got closer the pressure was on. Everyone spent time trying to find ways to naturally induce me. Keep in mind I was only a day late. But everyone was anxious to meet our little girl, and to be honest so was I. However, I was very nervous about it actually, about the whole labor thing. So part of me didn't really want to go into labor. I didn't know what to expect. I have read several books about the subject, and tried to become as educated as possible about it, but nothing can actually tell you how you as an individual is going to feel in the moment of delivering your child...

It was Monday morning early. All of our family were leaving that day. They were a bit disappointed that they weren't going to get to be the welcoming commitee for our new baby. All night I had felt contractions in my sleep, but nothing serious and I didn't even know how far apart they were. At 2:30am I was awakened by a pretty intense contraction. I was so excited! I woke Erik up and we began to count how often they were happening. We were surprised to find they were 2-3 min apart! We called our midwife and she said that even though they were close together they needed to be at east 1 min long (they were only 30 seconds long). So we waited... My whole family woke up and waited with us. My sister and her husband were here and they were timing the contractions and holding my hand through the pain. Then we called my other sister and she and her husband came over and waited with us. It was a family affair! It was nice to have them there, however my contractions were pretty intense. Only after 2 hours my contractions were a min long but still 2 min apart...and at this point I had thrown up because I was in so much pain. I called the midwife and we were off to the hospital. If I wasn't in so much pain I would've laughed at how crazy my family was being. They were all anxious and scared looking. My dad was creepy if he was he one going into labor!

Once we were at the hospital...I kind of blanked out. I was in so much pain and at some point my contractions were only 1 min apart, but my water hadn't even broken yet. Eventually I remember hearing that I was 8 cm dilated, and then my water broke. After that the pain was just down right ridiculous! I didn't get an epidural considering I had said from the beginning that I wanted to go natural. However I did try a warm shower...which worked for two seconds. Then I broke down and tried dilauded. This was like taking 1 Advil for a gunshot wound. So pretty much I was on my own. After what seemed like years of pain, I was finally dilated fully and was ready to push. Literally I have NEVER been so excited to do something! I mean I think I actually smiled when it was time to push. And after 30 min she was out! However she had some meconium in her lungs. So frightening not to hear your baby cry. The midwife had a whole team of doctors working on my baby. They didn't want her to take her first breath right away in case she swallowed more. I don't exactly know how long it took for them to get it all out, but it felt like forever before I finally heard her cry. And as soon as she did, I started to cry. I just remember being so relieved that she was out, safe, and beautiful! They put her on me and there was an instant connection. Erik and just sat there looking at our little girl, and the whole world stopped.
Even now thinking back I get a little emotional, cause she was just perfect and I couldn't possibly have predicted I would be this in love.
I am truly thankful for my little girl, Eliana Rose.

Friday, July 2, 2010

A new home

We move into our new apartment in a week. I could not be more excited and nervous. So far I haven't had too many nesting cravings, however now that I know where we're going to live, I dream about cleaning and decorating. While Erik is dreaming about being a spy or flying, I am dreaming about picking out paint colors. Its soo strange. I am really excited to make a place for our new family. We have no furniture however, so I have been looking for things that are our style. I am also very excited to start fresh and pick out new things. We have a couch and dining room table. However we need to pick out a bed/dresser. At any rate, all this means is we get to take a much needed trip to Ikea.

I love Ikea, I could live in Ikea. Erik doesn't like it because its a little stressful with all those people and all those options. We usually get into several spats about colors and style. I thought that I had married a man who didn't care about what our place looks such luck. Erik very much has his own taste and style and what he thinks our place should look like.

As soon as we get the keys, I am going to start nesting, and hopefully that will mean the decorating dreams will stop.